In the April 2018 issue of Parents magazine, there’s an article called “Refuse to Lose It” that talks about how to more effectively communicate with your child(ren) without yelling.
Admittedly, I have the cutest daughter in the world, but she oftensometimes on occasion tests my patience…particularly when it’s time to go to sleep. When I’m tired, my fuse becomes a lot shorter, and I find myself getting upset with her really quickly. This isn’t good for either of us!
This article was full of tips on how to communicate without yelling or fussing, so I’ve been working to implement those tips. Let me tell you, it’s been tough this week too because she’s been sick and bedtime and nights have been even more difficult than usual! One tip that has stood out to me more than any is to look at Charlotte and tell her how much I love her when I’m really frustrated. It may sound corny, but it’s true that it’s tough to be mad or upset when you think about just how much you love your child!
I know that there are going to be more times in the future when she tests my patience. There will be probably be more times even before this evening is finished! However, I want to keep implementing these strategies as much as possible to make me a more effective communicator and a better mom!
If you’re a parent, how do you keep your cool when your kids are pushing you to your limit? If you’re not a parent, what strategies do you use with your loved ones? Any advice is welcome! 🙂
In Charlotte’s two month update, I mentioned that I had already returned to work. I wanted to talk a little bit about why I had to go back to work earlier than I had anticipated.
When Charlotte was born, the delivery team noticed that she had what looked like a cleft lip that had healed in utero. She also had a crooked nose, but her dad’s nose is crooked and since she looked just like him, we figured it was just another quirk! The pediatrician on call and her pediatrician both checked her out and determined that her palette looked good. She was also eating just fine, so it didn’t seem to be a problem. However, we wanted to have her checked out just in case there was something that could potentially become a problem down the road.
It seems more noticeable in pictures than in real life!
Our pediatrician gave us a referral to a pediatric plastic surgeon at Vanderbilt who specializes in cleft and craniofacial surgeries, and my parents and I took her for her appointment (I made my husband stay at work because I wanted him to save his leave time in case we had to go back). The appointment was…interesting. The surgeon came in, briefly examined her, gave me a pamphlet on cleft lips/palettes, then sent in his surgery scheduler. There wasn’t any “I’ll let you guys discuss it” or anything like that; it just happened! In a weird way, it was comforting because he wasn’t concerned about anything he saw, so it made me feel like she would be an easy case.
He did explain that the muscles that control her being able to pucker her mouth could be affected. He also said that because her nose was crooked, it could flatten out and cause breathing troubles later on. She would have to be monitored for four years after her surgery, and they would pay attention to her speech development. None of us had realized that those were potential problems! I guess that’s why he’s the doctor and none of us are! 😉
I went back to work and made arrangements to be off from the end of June until the end of July. My husband made arrangements with his job, and we scheduled our furry child to be boarded. Everyone was getting ready for the day as it approached and then the Friday before the surgery, the scheduler emailed me and said that the surgeon needed to be off on her surgery day, so we would have to reschedule it.
Um, excuse me?
After being pretty upset initially, we realized it was going to work out a little better for a few reasons and have started making arrangements for an August date instead of two days from now. I’m nervous about it because she’s so little, but that’s also a benefit because she won’t remember anything. Plus, she’s going to be the only baby in her circle time group this fall who’s had a nose job!
I wasn’t going to write about this, but I thought I would share since quite a few people in real life already know about it. Also, I thought she might want to read about it someday. Maybe I should rename the blog “Charlotte’s Mom I Am”…ha!
Her new surgery date is August 4, so we would appreciate any prayers, good thoughts, or positivity you want to send our way!
I recently received the opportunity to review Mama Needs a Do-Over by Lisa Pennington. Pennington, a blogger and the mother of nine (!!) children offers ten steps that mothers can use to reset themselves and their children when everyone is having a hard day.
Click on the picture to purchase your own copy!
I liked that her chapters were full of personal anecdotes and scriptural references. I’ll be honest; if I had nine children, I don’t know if I would have time to remember Scripture, much less quote it!
I also appreciated the exercises that she had in each chapter. It made going through the chapters much more interactive, plus I think it will make me more likely to remember and implement her strategies when my own future bundle of joy is pushing me to the edge!
I would recommend this book to any mother (or even many women) who are struggling with keeping it all together. Even though we only have a fur child until April, I could use some of the strategies now. Hopefully my scrambled egg brains can remember these techniques. Somehow I think if a mother of nine can do it, then so can I!
Disclosure the first: I received a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. All opinions are my own.
Disclosure the second: The link above is an affiliate link. Purchasing the item with the link will provide money for diapers and superhero onesies.